Travis and I were blessed a couple of weeks ago by being involved in a winter camp here in the area. The camp was for teens and the subject was "Sex, Dating, and Relationships." Being so recently married ourselves, we were able to share with the kids our own testimony of purity, and God's grace made evident in our lives. I thought I'd share a little bit with you of what was brought to my mind again that week...the necessity of cultivating faithfulness.
As young women, our desire for relationship begins very early. From the time I was about 4 or 5 I remember longing for marriage and that special prince charming! And that desire never went away- in fact, it only intensified as I got older. When my older brother got married at 18, I was sure the same would happen to me! I eagerly looked for the special someone who would make my life complete. But, 18 came and went and there were no suitors charging in on white horses. Young though I was, it felt like endless waiting...what to do?
I remember at one point coming across this passage:
Psalm 37:3-5: "Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it."Dwell in the land! Cultivate faithfulness- grow it! That was my responsibility!
How soon is too soon to start being faithful to my spouse? No age is too soon! Pledge faithfulness in thought and conduct NOW!
Prov. 31:12 says, "She (the "excellent wife") does him good and not harm ALL the days of her life (emphasis added)."
How can I be faithful when I don't even know him?
-Guard, guard, guard! Guard your heart. Guard your eyes. Guard your body. Guard your emotions. Don't give away to someone else what belongs to your husband- not just physically, but also emotionally-what only he should see or know.
-Be loyal to him now- don't go chasing after every guy who compliments and tries to romance you before he has a right to! Behave in your relationships with the opposite sex in ways that are honoring and respectful to your future husband (and their future wife, for that matter!).
What do I do while I wait?
-Work on your heart. If you are not content before you meet someone, you will not be complete with them. Take the time while you are single to cultivate a heart of faithfulness, both to your future spouse AND to the Lord. The Lord MUST fill the longing for love in your heart before you will ever be satisfied with any person.
-Pray, pray, pray!! Pray for your spouse. Don't be afraid to pray very specifically. Pray for their family, their friends, their spiritual growth. Prayer is powerful!!
Why should I do this?
-God says so!! How does scripture describe real love?
1 Cor. 13:4-8a puts it this way (I've highlighted some that are particularly relevant!): "Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails..."By its nature, love is faithful.
-The rewards are incalculable. Now that I am married, I can tell you that it is hard even to describe how important faithfulness is in a marriage relationship. You would do well to begin to practice it now! It means so very much that your spouse practices- has been practicing- faithfulness. My husband and I shared our very first kiss (with each other or anyone else) on our wedding day and we cannot thank the Lord enough for preserving our hearts and bodies for one another. Having a marriage begun in this way is one of the most beautiful, most rewarding things I have ever experienced. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
My commitment to my husband did not start at the altar, 6 mo. ago. It did not even start on New Year's eve the year before, when I accepted his marriage proposal. My commitment to my husband began 7 or 8 years ago, when I decided to cultivate a heart of faithfulness.
Even if you have done things you regret, and have made mistakes, begin NOW to cultivate a heart of faithfulness.
God is the originator, the greatest example of faithfulness there is- give your heart to Him, put it in His care and ask Him to not let you give it away until it is His perfect timing.
Wow, Jenn. they knew what they were doing when they asked you to talk at the camp. :) its great to be reminded that the wait may seem long, but its worth it! i love you! and you should totally write more! :D
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